RAD Sucks

I usually try to think of a cute or creative title for my blog entries, but after today, the only one I can come up with is "RAD Sucks." I have the 5 most beautiful, creative, and brilliant children ever born, but apparently my 3 girls have spent too much time around Darth Vader because they choose to use this talent for the "dark side." I'm old, I'm tired, and as priviously stated in another entry, I do not know how to take care of myself. These girls have been kicking my butt the last two weeks. E stole a cell phone back in May and is still doing jobs to pay restitution for that. She has had to earn back all of her privledges, including the 4th of July and her grandparent's visit next week. Ever since she learned that her grandparents are coming, the birdy has hit the fan and we have "shredded tweet." I usually do not tell her when things are going to happen until we on in the car on the way there. She will drive us crazy with questions, reminders, bizare behavior, and "hovering." We have nicknamed her Huey, because she resembles a helicopter the way she hovers over everyone. She follows my husband and me so close that if we stop walking or turn around, she will run into us. Because she had not earned enough points for her grandparents' visit, I felt I needed to tell her so she had something to work towards. FAIL!! She completely fell apart. Every behavior trippled in severity, and some old ones that we hadn't seen in a while, came back with a vengence. Over a month ago, we had been having serious problems with temper tantrums. One morning, out of the blue, I said to her, "Would you please have a tantrum, because I have the best consequence, and I really want to use it." She looked at me like my head was on upsidedown, and said, "As long as I live here, I will never throw a tantrum again." Everytime she started to get a little agitated, I'd say, "Cool! I might get to use my consequence." and she'd settle right down. Until today. Today, I got to use my consequence-- Twice!! I looked up the two natural disasters that her tantrums most resembled, and she had to do a two-page report on each of them with a paragraph at the end telling how her tantrums resembled them. I chose volcanoes and thunderstorms. She had to use correct spelling, punctuation, and cursive writing. I was VERY picky. It took her 3 hours to come up with 2 pages. That's okay. She just has less time to earn the points needed to see her grandparents. I have arranged respite for her, just incase. I should explain that it is her bio father's mother and her husband who are coming. They are not grandparents to any of the other children, but they have adopted the other 4 anyway. They are incredible people, and I can't wait to see them again. Getting the necessary points is not unattainable, but she will have to work very hard to get them. Unfortunately, her biggest downfall is her mouth. She is so disrespectful when she is mad, and she loses points for each offense.

B has other issues. The mosquitos are horrible this summer, and she is covered with bites. She has scratched everyone of them open to the point of infection. We have tried SkeeterStik, bandaids, socks over her hands, clipping her nails almost to bleeding, and time-out for each time we see an open wound. Nothing works. The program we are using suggests putting her in the bathroom each time we see her digging, and giving her 10 minutes to finish her "hobby." She LOVES this. She digs for 10 minutes straight. My bathroom looked like a murder scene. She wouldn't stop when the time was up, so I left her in there for another 10 minutes. When the scabs were all picked, she made sores where there weren't any. God help me, I do not know what to do with her. I wouldn't worry so much, but she is getting infection in all of the sores. The doctor is no help. He said the socks are abusive and that if I can't find a way to keep the medicine on the sore, I am an unfit mother. I told him to do a little research on RAD. Yes, I will be taking my kids back to him. He's a wonderful doctor, unfortunately like the rest of the medical profession, knows nothing about RAD. B also has no self control. She will repeat something constantly until you stop her. I timed her once. She repeated the same line from a song over and over for three minutes and four seconds until I could not stand it anymore. Today is the first time I have had enough self restraint to let her go until she stopped herself. She spun in a circle for over five minutes until she stopped to throw up. I handed her a paper towel and walked away. She cleaned up the mess and started spinning again. She also throws tantrums, has a smart mouth, and throws things. Oh yeah. I almost forgot. During her tantrum, E threw a lot of the things we had given her into the hallway. I boxed them up and gave them to Goodwill. This is not the first time she has done this, but it is the first time that I didn't give her back her things. Since her boombox and cds went in the box this time, I would hope she thinks long and hard before she does this again.

Now for A. She has torn a whole pannel of wallpaper off the wall in the girls' room. Everytime she gets mad, she wets her pants. When she gets in the pool, she poops in her suit. If she gets a hold of anything that writes, she scribbles on anything she knows is important to us. She used a permanant red marker on the side of my grandmother's piano that my husband made into a curio cabinet. Short of sanding it down and refinishing it, it can't be cleaned. All of these behaviors have happend in less than two weeks. Put all of this with the typical behavior that a four-year-old boy displays, and the a-typical behavior that a prepubesent boy with Cerebral Palsy exhibits, and I am ready for a room with padded walls. Unfortunately, my husband has not been able to help much (through no fault of his own) and my gal that usually helps with the kids has been helping her mother who recently had surgery. Luckily, I do have this blog, and I can escape to my nice, clean room and read after the kids go to bed. But then, I'd probably read a scary Mary Higgins Clark book and have to sleep with the light on again. Calgon can't take me away. There's not enough chocolate in the world to take care of this one. My mommy lives in Texas and is gone for the weekend. Guess I should just snuggle under the covers with my one eyed, noseless teddy bear, say my prayers, and hope for a better day tomorrow. I love my children, I love my children, I love my children. Where's the Tylenol P.M.?