We've all heard about how to tell if you are an optimist or pestimist by judging the glass half full or half empty. Well, I used to fall into a third category-- It was always a half a glass. I guess that could be described as complacency. Oh well, this is what life handed me and it's never gonna change. As I've gotten older, I've gotten fiestier. Life doesn't hand me anything. If I want it, I've got to get it myself.
I first realized I possessed this strength when I was diagnosed with a heart condition. I was told I needed a heart transplant. I fought it, I prayed, and I found a new doctor who tried a different medication. Twenty two years later, I'm still here.
When my son was diagnosed with Neuronal Migratory Disorder, that fighting spirit came out again. I was told by an expert in the field to "Take him home and love him because he won't be worth anything." I was also told that I had caused his condition by something I did when I was pregnant. After the initial shock wore off, I did everything I could to help my son. He is walking, attending regular classes, with the exception of reading and math which are modified, and he is one of the coolest kids around. When I took him to a different doctor, he ordered a bunch of tests for D. I will never forget sitting in his office when he looked at the brain scan. He looked at the results, then looked at D. Then, he stared in disbelief at me. "Whatever you are doing with this child keep it up." He said smiling. He showed me the paper with the results on it. It said the patient would most likely live in a vegitative state. I checked the name on the top of the sheet. Yeah, it was my son. His brain was a mess. He should have been in a vegitative state. When I asked him how he was doing as well as he was, he replied, "He's a determined little guy, and he's got an incredible momma." Pretty high praise coming from an actual "Brain Surgeon."
I knew I had the potential for extreme strength, but nothing brought it out more than when two of my kids were diagnosed with RAD. I searched the internet for weeks looking for ways to parent my little ones. I read books, watched videos, and devoured a 10 DVD training session in three days. What I found was, my kids couldn't change (heal, grow, evolve, etc) without me changing (healing, et al) first. I concentrated on myself, not my children. I paid attention to how I responded to their actions. I forced myself to be happy, even when my child was melting into a huge, gooey pile of confusion. I tried to approach everything, and I do mean everything, with a a positive attitude. Sure, a lot of times, I reverted back to the yelling and the punishing, but for the most part, I kept everything upbeat and happy, even goofy. My kids responded. They healed, a lot!! E started doing her homework, and helping out around the house. B struggles with her other diagnoses (Aspergers, OCD, ADHD,) but that is mostly because I have not figured out how to parent her muti-dimentional issues. I'm getting there, but not where I want to be, yet. I use a lot of humor and unexpected responses to "head off" the behaviors. When the three little ones are playing on the floor and they start to fight, I'll throw myself in the middle of everything and sing (very loudly and off-key) "My eyes adored you, la la la la la la la, My eyes adored you." Those are the only words I know, but they are effective. I'm really creative, and I get to use that creativity to parent my kids. I'm actually having a blast. That's not to say that I don't lose it once in a while, I do, but I just mentally imagine myself in a bikini, and I start to laugh. When I do get time to myself, I try to do only things that recharge my spirit and bring me bliss (there's that word again!!) My wardrobe is made up of bliss skirts, yummy shoes, kalidascopic tops, and "squishy comfy" pants. I sing with the window down in my van. Sometimes I choose to use my beautiful voice, and sometimes I don't. Depends on who's listening and what response I want from them. Some nights, I spend hours on the internet looking for great craft blogs and free downloads of my favorite games. I still have a tendency to let myself get run-down, but I just have to make that conscious "switch" to the positive side of my brain, and I can hit the floor running again. My glass is not half empty, half a glass, or even half full. My glass is over flowing because I've found a way to keep filling it up. RAD really does suck, but it has made me a more heavenly person, and for that, I am eternally grateful.
I first realized I possessed this strength when I was diagnosed with a heart condition. I was told I needed a heart transplant. I fought it, I prayed, and I found a new doctor who tried a different medication. Twenty two years later, I'm still here.
When my son was diagnosed with Neuronal Migratory Disorder, that fighting spirit came out again. I was told by an expert in the field to "Take him home and love him because he won't be worth anything." I was also told that I had caused his condition by something I did when I was pregnant. After the initial shock wore off, I did everything I could to help my son. He is walking, attending regular classes, with the exception of reading and math which are modified, and he is one of the coolest kids around. When I took him to a different doctor, he ordered a bunch of tests for D. I will never forget sitting in his office when he looked at the brain scan. He looked at the results, then looked at D. Then, he stared in disbelief at me. "Whatever you are doing with this child keep it up." He said smiling. He showed me the paper with the results on it. It said the patient would most likely live in a vegitative state. I checked the name on the top of the sheet. Yeah, it was my son. His brain was a mess. He should have been in a vegitative state. When I asked him how he was doing as well as he was, he replied, "He's a determined little guy, and he's got an incredible momma." Pretty high praise coming from an actual "Brain Surgeon."
I knew I had the potential for extreme strength, but nothing brought it out more than when two of my kids were diagnosed with RAD. I searched the internet for weeks looking for ways to parent my little ones. I read books, watched videos, and devoured a 10 DVD training session in three days. What I found was, my kids couldn't change (heal, grow, evolve, etc) without me changing (healing, et al) first. I concentrated on myself, not my children. I paid attention to how I responded to their actions. I forced myself to be happy, even when my child was melting into a huge, gooey pile of confusion. I tried to approach everything, and I do mean everything, with a a positive attitude. Sure, a lot of times, I reverted back to the yelling and the punishing, but for the most part, I kept everything upbeat and happy, even goofy. My kids responded. They healed, a lot!! E started doing her homework, and helping out around the house. B struggles with her other diagnoses (Aspergers, OCD, ADHD,) but that is mostly because I have not figured out how to parent her muti-dimentional issues. I'm getting there, but not where I want to be, yet. I use a lot of humor and unexpected responses to "head off" the behaviors. When the three little ones are playing on the floor and they start to fight, I'll throw myself in the middle of everything and sing (very loudly and off-key) "My eyes adored you, la la la la la la la, My eyes adored you." Those are the only words I know, but they are effective. I'm really creative, and I get to use that creativity to parent my kids. I'm actually having a blast. That's not to say that I don't lose it once in a while, I do, but I just mentally imagine myself in a bikini, and I start to laugh. When I do get time to myself, I try to do only things that recharge my spirit and bring me bliss (there's that word again!!) My wardrobe is made up of bliss skirts, yummy shoes, kalidascopic tops, and "squishy comfy" pants. I sing with the window down in my van. Sometimes I choose to use my beautiful voice, and sometimes I don't. Depends on who's listening and what response I want from them. Some nights, I spend hours on the internet looking for great craft blogs and free downloads of my favorite games. I still have a tendency to let myself get run-down, but I just have to make that conscious "switch" to the positive side of my brain, and I can hit the floor running again. My glass is not half empty, half a glass, or even half full. My glass is over flowing because I've found a way to keep filling it up. RAD really does suck, but it has made me a more heavenly person, and for that, I am eternally grateful.
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